Thursday's visit to my high risk specialist didn't exactly bring the kind of news I was expecting, or even hoping for. Until now, my cervix was shortening by 0.4 cm at each visit. This time it went down all the way from 2.0 cm to 0.7 cm! I have barely any cervix left at all now. What’s interesting is the foreshadowing that led to this. Since Sunday I’ve been feeling as though one or both babies have been trying to kick their way out, and sure enough, the monitor showed the boy’s foot right in the funnel of my opening cervix. These kicks are shocking and usually painful. Yet another issue I have absolutely no control over.
Thankfully, not all the news was bad. The doctor performed another FFN test to check my risk of preterm labor and my results this morning came back negative. Had they come back positive, he would have admitted me to the hospital today, and administered steroids to expedite development of the babies’ lungs in anticipation that I would soon go into labor. Given that my results were negative, and that I still have at least some cervix left, this just meant continuation of very strict bed rest at home. The doctor said it is likely that my cervix will have opened completely by my next appointment (Aug 4) and they will likely hospitalize me for the remainder of my pregnancy for observation. Once the cervix has opened, the babies and the uterus are no longer sealed in a sterile environment, so there is an increased risk of infection which they have to constantly monitor me for. I’m trying to relish every minute of bed rest in my own home for now!
The doctor attempted to look on the bright side by telling me about another patient of his whom, at 24 weeks, her cervix was 0.5 cm and FFN results came back positive. He hospitalized her and she made it to 32 weeks. I’m at 26 weeks and have slightly more cervix than her and negative FFN results. In six more weeks I’ll be at 32 weeks. Right now our major milestone to reach is 28 weeks, at which time the babies will have a 90% chance survival rate outside the womb.
The severe shortening and continued restrictions are taking a toll on me emotionally (as I’m sure they are John as well). Wanting some control over my situation, I wish there was something I could do to stop the shortening, to help out around the house, and to make myself just feel healthier, happier and more energized. I know in my heart that God has plans for me, for John, and for these two little ones, but I start the “what if” cycle after each round of bad news and I’m struggling to just put it and leave it in His hands.
Even with all these issues, the babies are still alive and baking, and that’s the most important thing right now. Thank you again for your continued thoughts and prayers. And many thanks to those of you who visited this week (Tricia, Terri, Candy, Betty Ann, Ken and Regina (who's also preggers))… Your company was the highlight of my days/week!
Thankfully, not all the news was bad. The doctor performed another FFN test to check my risk of preterm labor and my results this morning came back negative. Had they come back positive, he would have admitted me to the hospital today, and administered steroids to expedite development of the babies’ lungs in anticipation that I would soon go into labor. Given that my results were negative, and that I still have at least some cervix left, this just meant continuation of very strict bed rest at home. The doctor said it is likely that my cervix will have opened completely by my next appointment (Aug 4) and they will likely hospitalize me for the remainder of my pregnancy for observation. Once the cervix has opened, the babies and the uterus are no longer sealed in a sterile environment, so there is an increased risk of infection which they have to constantly monitor me for. I’m trying to relish every minute of bed rest in my own home for now!
The doctor attempted to look on the bright side by telling me about another patient of his whom, at 24 weeks, her cervix was 0.5 cm and FFN results came back positive. He hospitalized her and she made it to 32 weeks. I’m at 26 weeks and have slightly more cervix than her and negative FFN results. In six more weeks I’ll be at 32 weeks. Right now our major milestone to reach is 28 weeks, at which time the babies will have a 90% chance survival rate outside the womb.
The severe shortening and continued restrictions are taking a toll on me emotionally (as I’m sure they are John as well). Wanting some control over my situation, I wish there was something I could do to stop the shortening, to help out around the house, and to make myself just feel healthier, happier and more energized. I know in my heart that God has plans for me, for John, and for these two little ones, but I start the “what if” cycle after each round of bad news and I’m struggling to just put it and leave it in His hands.
Even with all these issues, the babies are still alive and baking, and that’s the most important thing right now. Thank you again for your continued thoughts and prayers. And many thanks to those of you who visited this week (Tricia, Terri, Candy, Betty Ann, Ken and Regina (who's also preggers))… Your company was the highlight of my days/week!
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Betty Ann, Candy & Me
Regina & Ken
3 comments:
Hey girl! Jessica gave me the link to your blog so I've been catching up on everything! I'm so glad that you are still getting to stay at home and not having to be admitted to the hospital! Tommy and I have been praying for you guys every day and will continue to do so. We'd love to come by and see you some time, just let me know when is a good time!
Caroline, I am thinking about you today and hoping you are getting your mind around your new news from the Dr. There are many positives right now and that is what I am going to focus on for you and pray for. I too struggle with handing it all over to God. I'll call you when I get back into cell. phone range! Love you and stay strong! :)
You and the babies are in our prayers as always! Stay strong and positive!
Love you guys!!!
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